question

i'm just throwing this out into the www.

is anyone happy with what they are studying/studied at college? what would you go back and major/minor in if you could?

answer if you want. i'd love to hear some honest answers about this.

school's out so i'm blogging again.

// bye white house. i love you // last night with my roommates/lovers //

// and just like that, all of my dollars turned into euros // pretty trees. not-so-pretty smell //

// last day of work, kickin it in my private bathroom // no more early morning editing. at least for the next 6 weeks //

// our blood, sweat, and tears went into those wings for the film. literally all of those fluids // oh, hi mason //

//sam let me be his coach for the day // that movie is in my top 20 //

i look happy here but don't be fooled

PACKING AND MOVING IS THE BANE OF MY LIFE.

endings and beginnings

me and two of my best friends from film school being happy at the bon jovi concert. sam and martha.

I'm taking an 18 month break from school. And chances are, most all of my friends will be graduated and will have moved on to new things when I finally make it back to school. This is really disheartening, and it's a sacrifice for me.

But remember how I felt this same wistful feeling at the end of last semester? And at the end of last school year? And a little teeny bit at the end of high school? It's a pattern. A pattern that applies to most everyone I think, but I've just now pinpointed it for me. 

Everything ends. All these good, amazing, fun, awesome things I get to do start out as a sometimes uncomfortable adjustment, but by the time it ends I realize how much it has meant to me and how much I love it. I grow really close to people easily. Sometimes I think my heart is too big because I get attached to people and things (and books and songs and movies and sandwiches) so easily. Then the great thing has to come to an end and we have to leave, and I feel like something is missing for a while. Then I meet new people that get to fill in those voids. 

I'm sad about it now, but I know that the emptiness that is left after this semester will be filled eventually. I'll go through the same cycle of adjustment, being comfortable, being happy, and then sadness upon the inevitable end. It's going to happen with my study abroad, and then happen again (probably times 100) with my mission.

I'm learning not to be sad when it's time for another ending. Isn't it great that we all get to be characters in each other's stories? Going through this cycle of loving people and leaving people just makes us warmer and more human, I think. And things will always come back into our lives to help fill in the gaps again. And I'm going to be happy. I am happy.

don't read this, mom

captain's log: 15 April 2013, 1:35 am.

writing a research paper. due at 9am.

currently on my 39th hour in a row of no sleep.

kid cudi, U2, brandon flowers, and bastille keeping my company.

surprisingly, not feeling stressed out at all.

but the sleep deprivation is beginning to set in.

over and out.

monday thoughts

when i was young i used to think that because i had two sets of grandparents, each set of grandparents also had another set of grandkids. you know what i'm saying? like how i have my mom's side of the family and my dad's side of the family, i thought my cousins and i were only one set of grandkids, and my grandparents had another group of grandkids that i had never seen before.  i couldn't really understand that i could have two grandpas and two grandmas, but each couple only got one set of grandkids. oh, how i longed to meet those other sets of grandkids.

ok, that doesn't really make sense. neither does this research paper i'm trying to write.

ps - if you are on spring break right now, BE GRATEFUL.

sweet tender mercies

i'm feeling way behind in school right now. after my busy weekend especially. and here i am blogging instead of writing the 2000 words that are due tomorrow!

amidst all the chaos (and sometimes crappy-ness) that has been this month of march, a few tender mercies stuck out to me today:

i got my film history midterm back today and i NAILED it.
i ran into the whole men's rugby team.
i'm getting sick, but i found a whole bottle of ibuprofen in my backpack today to remedy it.
my professor's wife is having a baby so class is cancelled on thursday.
i got an email from the italy rome mission saying that i get to wear my sandals and my boots. YAAAY YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW HAPPY I AM!
even though i have a big paper due tomorrow that i haven't started, it's a paper about "who framed roger rabbit" because my major is the shiz.
my bff kelyn sends me paul rudd gifs daily.

k now i gotta WRITE. peace.

your cocoon and you

i've been MIA this week and here's why:

we're making our movie.

there's the director, directing the fabulous actors.

this script is awesome and hilarious. the crew is so fun. the production design is really wacky.

30 of my past 48 hours have been spent working on set.

needless to say, i look like i could be on the walking dead right now, 

but i love making movies!

stole this photo from jacy.

because my hands were too slimy to be taking photos....

dobby had to iron his hands

an update on the cocoon-building:

here's what my hands looked like on friday night after 7 hours of making the cocoon.

hot glue plus chicken wire are a deadly combo.

but the cocoon is coming along. this will be a fun movie.

if you want to see a trailer for a movie i helped on last semester, click here.

in other news, i wish i would have put some money on my oscars ballot, because my predictions were solid and i would be rich today.

"'i really delivered this year, so i'd like to thank myself!'--quentin tarantino" --jessie

this week is a doozy

it's my fault it's a doozy.
all of my school, work, and side projects... and i decide to make another film on my own.
man.
beer me strength to make it through the week.
please.

boooks

read these this week:

and only two of them were required for school!

guess which ones. probably not the ones you'd suspect.

reading books for fun. nothing like it.

sleepytime notes

these are my notes today. i wrote it all in my sleep. can you tell?

i can only imagine how hilarious i looked as i tried so hard to stay awake.

the kid next to me must think i'm a FOOL. i sort of hope he filmed me.

curse you, museum of art lighting. staying conscious is no easy task.

school is my boyfriend.

i bought this little beauty today, and i got some kind of mysterious discount. i high-fived myself.

this semester:

15 credits

working 20 hours a week

editing side project for my professor

art director on capstone film

youtube sketch comedy group

assistant director for a project

assistant editor for a project

someone get me a time-turner.

sadly, i had to drop one class (i was at 18 credits) to retain my physical and mental health. 

and dropping that one cool class is breaking my heart. no one normal should like school this much. 

now i know how hermione must have felt when dumbledore canceled all their final exams.

first day of skool

and ALL of my syllabi were printed on green paper. what could this mean?

movee

we each had to make a short fiction for our final for our basic production class. everyone did such a good job. i want to post all of them here! 

this one is my friend josh's movie. i wrote the script, and then he adapted it and made it. it's so good! he did a way better job with it than i would have done.

something you should know: C-47 is what clothes pins are called in the film world. i wrote it to be kind of an inside joke. 

josh rocked it.

our magical friendship

i mentioned that this has been my favorite semester ever. i learned so much about myself, the world, art, people, and of course films and media in general. i loved going to every single class and looked forward to doing my homework. i grew so much and had amazing professors and watched and read cool things and made cool movies and great friends and never fell asleep in class.. guys, film school is awesome.

i have to attribute some of the awesome-ness to those two guys, hunter and kelyn. unfortunately, we didn't take any pictures together, which is weird because we spent hours and hours and hours and hours together. in class, outside class, on set, etc. we are harry, ron, and hermione in my own universe.

these guys are hilarious and nice and geniuses and they really made my semester neat.  hunter is leaving us for a semester for a fancy pants internship in L.A. (like a REALLY fancy pants internship) and we're going to miss him like crazy. but i'm so happy i'll still get to spend every day next semester hanging out with kelyn. these guys, these guys. they're the best. film school is the best.

planner doodles coming at you again.

this raccoon is smiling because he doesn't have a final at 7am tomorrow.

raccoons never have finals.

lucky, lucky raccoon.

my headphones are getting a lot of use lately.

here's what's coming out of them.

sleepwalk - santo and johnny
ultraviolet - killers
erase me - kid cudi
it's all coming back to me now - celine dion
fluorescent adolescent - kate nash version
sleepsong - bastille
dreams - fleetwood mac
leave the bourbon on the shelf - killers
feel inside and stuff like that - flight of the conchords
the girl - the city and colour
time to say goodbye - andrea bocelli and sarah brightman
40 day dream - edward sharpe (always)
and THIS ENTIRE CONCERT - killers

and much much more! there's just so much goodness out there. and i'm taking it all in instead of studying for finals. tee hee hee. yikes.

my face when i woke up and remembered it was the last day of school:

this has been the best semester of all time ever. more on that later. but. 

i'm excited for christmas break when all i have to do is eat christmas-y treats and play monopoly.

november times

i saw 4am far too many times and ate a metric ton of nutella.
i saw the killers and died of happiness. and maybe busted a vocal chord for screaming.
i was told that i was funnier than dick van dyke and conan. whoa. maybe a hyperbole there.
two of my professors replied to my tweets. which is more validating than a celebrity replying. (and i actually got a semi-celebrity favorite on a tweet, which was neat).
i got an awesome thanksgiving break with my favorite people and cat in the whole world.
i made some incredibly awesome friends. the film department brings similar people together and we spent hours and hours oversharing our entire life stories with each other while working on set and making cool things together.
november: good.